Journal

2019!

2019! What a year. Let’s review this year in chronological order, so it’s not all over the place.

January

  • Finishing my 3rd semester.

February

beautiful sunset at Kota Kinabalu Sabah Waterfront

March

  • Volunteering with SEKRUM and MAB

April

  • SEKRUM VANA dinner

May

  • Volunteering at PPUM with SEKRUM
  • Reunited with Umie.

June

  • Home, Raya, Alfia.

July

August

  • A very very stressful month
  • Busan

September

October

  • Ulsan trip
Daewangam park Ulsan
Place to go in Ulsan

November

  • KNU life

December

  • KNU life
  • Seoul trip

2019!

At the very beginning of the year, I am very not comfortable with being alone but through out the year, I tend to love it and I will feel exhausted whenever I didn’t have my alone. I think thanks to my amazing support system I can spend my time for myself knowing they will always be there for me and of course I will always be there for them.  So, I think my gain from this is acknowledging my support system and prioritizing them. I keep my circle small and allow very less people in. I’m not playing all mighty, but I love myself. So those in my support system, thank you for accepting me for who I am and know that I will be there for you. I love myself more because of you. 

By the end of this year, I can get over anxiety attack faster than before and I let go of stuff that out of my control. I’m very proud of myself for that. Despite the process to learn those values is very painful but its surely worth it. I think, thanks to those I surround myself with, I tend to give less fuck bout things I can’t control. Seriously, why did I do that to myself. I can’t even control it and I’m stressing bout it, what am I thinking haha Glad I’m slowly over that.

Volunteering really changed me. I really had fun joining any volunteering event and meeting new people through it. I really am happy volunteering. I can help myself through it. Its kinda selfish to say that volunteering is helping me instead of helping others, but it is what it is. It helps me when I saw theres a lot of us that willing to spend our precious weekend to help others or the amount of blessing we have and how the amazing people that we help are inspiring me to be stronger and better. To be able to meet amazing people (literally everyone) along the way is always the biggest takeaways of joining volunteering.

Formula 1. The best Youtube recommendation ever haha So in April, I bought a Ferrari F1 merch for my dad. I googled “Scuderia Ferrari” to know which branch it is and turned out it’s a F1 team. So, from that one Google search, Youtube started to recommend me a lot of F1 content and here I am now, a fan of F1 sport.

2019 has been a year where im more present, more living and less surviving. Im out from the time machine that I stuck in for 2 years. Ive changed a lot and it’s a good change. I hope to keep on re-inventing myself for the better and be grateful for the hard times as it will teach me such a precious value. Hope everyone can reflect back on their 2019 and learn a lot from it!

Bye, happy new year!